The T-Files

Over the course of the year in W2-S Timo managed to say some wonderful things that caused us all to laugh to a point where it became unhealthy. The first ever recorded T-File was 'D-oscar', Timo's reply when asked to think of a name beginning with D. This caused us to begin to write down *everything* fun that Timo ever said. Below are just a few of these gems. (Edited by Timo, of course, so he doesn't look too stupid on the 'Net)

Us: "Think of a name beginning with 'D'."
Timo: "ermm...D-oscar."

Timo (holding 1995 road atlas): "I've had this for years."

Sticky Label on his disk-drive saying "Remember to switch on."

"It amused me how funny it was"

He has a post-it note saying 'MINUTE' (min-et) because he can never spell it... "I always end up writing 'MINUTE'" (my-newt)

While brushing his teeth, Us: "Don't you want toothpaste on that?"
Timo: "Oh yeah, I forgot."

"I've adopted a patio"

Timo during a practical lesson: "Do we have to wait for that to heat down?"

Timo telling a joke: " was a decent, no, it was a shit bike, no.........erm yes, no, that's right, it was a decent bike..."

"...and the bus driver chased him down the road in the actual...err, what's it called...oh yeah, bus!"

Live on Jungle Pressure, his own UKCR radio show: "That's all from me, Timo, for this week. I'll be back on...Thursday, yeah that's right."

Writes 'Jungle Show' on every Thursday of his term-planner in case he forgets!!

After sending 240 volts through himself: "My arm feels funny."

Calling best friend after six weeks of knowing him: "Oi, er, what's your name?...Oh yeah, Andy."

Timo being serious: "You used to be able to buy packets of dried seeds which grew into little monkeys."

Suggests buying a friend a carpet for her birthday, decides on carpet tiles, as they're easier to carry to school.

22/11/95: Timo spells his name wrong

Timo: "I need some of those things that you blow your nose on."
Us: "Tissues!?"
Timo: "Yeah, that's it"

"I used to try and sniff flames"

"You know that song by some bloke?"

While playing pool: "If you wanted to win, you shouldn't have potted my white, black,, red."

While walking past the Police Station: "What are all those Police cars doing there?"

25/09/94: Timo draws Ceefax on his computer.

While sitting at breakfast: "What time is it at the North Pole?"

While wearing duvet: "I wanted to see if there was anything inside it."

While running the cold tap: "I was wondering why it wasn't getting any warmer."

"I've worked out why I'm always tired - someone is draining all my enery"

"If you wanted to be killed by a train which way would you lie on the tracks?"

Timo: "Oh, I want to get some of those soft fluffy things."
Us: "What you mean Marshmallows!?"
Timo: "Yeah they're the ones."

"My nose squeaks."

10/03/96: Timo checks his arse out in the mirror.

James: "I've just become an Uncle!"
Timo: "...Or an Auntie, depends on what sex the baby is."

"How old's 75?"

12/02/96: Timo forgets his age.

"Don't loose those disks, stick them somewhere with a magnet."